Ask the Expert: 'If I don't take the initiative, he doesn't proceed with the sexual act'

In OK! magazine, psychotherapist/sexologist Dr. Giorgos Lagios answers a reader's question about her partner's lack of initiative in their sexual life.

Marilia, 33, describes her peer partner as sweet and communicative, but he never takes the initiative in their sexual life. She is concerned because, while he says he desires her sexually, his actions show otherwise, creating awkwardness.

Dr. Lagios advises Marilia to speak openly with her partner, without criticism, to understand the reasons for this behavior. He points out that many people find it difficult to express their sexual desire due to various factors, such as traumatic experiences or low self-esteem.

The expert emphasizes the importance of erotic intelligence, which includes observation, self-observation, and empathy. He suggests that Marilia carefully observe her partner's behavior and give him the opportunity to open up and discuss everything. He points out that often, problems in the bedroom are a symptom of deeper issues.

Finally, Dr. Lagios advises Marilia to express her own desires and openly discuss how she would like to communicate before, during, and after sexual contact.